Caught up on uneasy sex chat”

‘Sex’ on open discussion has always been forbidden in our culture and our society, especially in Asian communities. As in to say, we would never bring up any topics  ‘relating, regarding or anything hovering around topic Sex’, in front of our parents, brothers, relatives or other people we associate with on day-day life. Nope! BUT hold your thoughts right there. It’s not because, we consider it is  ‘disgusting’ or think that ‘talking about it will damn our soul to hell for eternity ‘ but because, for many of us it is sacred.

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I grew up believing that virginity was most important thing in my life. (Many beliefs changed mid way in life by the way…cause life happened! 😉 ) But i wasn’t the single one on that belief. All of my friends held the same notion about ‘being virgin and about having sex’. Convinced that, we were only meant to give ourselves to man who we considered were worth our values and virtues. Meaning, according to our society and religion, ‘sex after marriage’, only with the person whom we were to tie our knot with.  Anyone aside that; thinking and talking sex with us and about us were morally, religiously and socially wrong. Punishable, a culprit accuse able of  vile offence.

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In Nepal, touching a woman by hand and hugging her no matter what the intentions are, is considered disrespectful. Doing ‘Namaste- putting together both hands’ is the right way to start with, to strike a conversation. Believe me it works fine, than doing it your ways and ending up being beaten charged for ‘molesting’ in public.

One of the biggest temple in here, is ‘Pashupatinath’, which is a most scared holy pilgrimage site for ‘hindus’ all over the world. Millions of devotees seek refuge here coming for miles and miles every year to pray ‘Shivalinga’. Now, if you see shivalinga, this statue, you’d wonder, “why is this God so different from others? Weird and least human than those with limbs?

This got me curious as well. I asked mom, but she remained hushed-hushed about it all the time. This is the problem with my mom… Had she told me, she would have saved me lot of embarrassment discovering the truth from others.

‘Shiva linga’ means, ‘genital part of lord Shiva’ and beneath him carved as a vessel is ‘genital part of goddess Parvati’.

It came to me as a shock first. But then, as i grew more mature, i realised its significance. That’s what happens with faith and religions. Many times we just follow through without knowing what are its core values. I understood then, all this while, we were praying act of ‘Procreation’ by Gods, by divinities.  ‘Sex’ was accepted, Sex was sacred. It was basic, a need  for survival of our gene pools.  7 billion people on this world where do you think they come from?

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Pinterest

 

NOW to the main topic, the reason why i wrote this blog. See? I can’t even write about ‘Sex’ straight without beating the bushes around it.

So the thing is, i was being a good girl, working on my computer, when my colleagues decided to chip in a fun topic ‘Sex’. I must admit beforehand, that i’m a medic and i don’t judge( mostly try not to if i’m to be honest) regarding people’s sexual preference, life and choices. Because, if i would, they wouldn’t open up to me. But in my personal life, well, i have  a lot of problems hearing my colleagues brag about their conquests, talk about their sizes and plan their next encounters. Both men and women.( Note- I work part time in an office. Not a hospital. In case you started thinking medics talk like that all the time. )

So back to the topic. Yes, i felt uneasy, especially after being told by one of the colleagues that ‘i haven’t done an Asian yet’ . Now, if it was me back in Nepal, among my people, I wouldn’t have mind giving him a good slap with all my five finger lines printed on his face. And believe me, people would have supported me, said that i did the right thing and he deserved it.  But here… i stared at him for good 1 minute, trying not to look shocked.  I still can’t figure where are the boundaries, where am i supposed to say ‘Stop’ HERE. ‘Want to go to swinger’s party with me?’.  I might as well explode!!!

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That’s the problem, when you are a grown Asian adult in your mid 20s trying to survive a western life. No matter how much you try to adjust, your values collide at some point. You might get used to being hugged, being kissed but at some point your still going to walk out of conversation, stay mute with earphone plugging your ears or just call in a sick leave. You can’t avoid getting uncomfortable , its impossible to stay float casually. 

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Pinterest

 

Elders say, “Adapt; dress and behave like the countrymen where you stay”.

Yes, we should be open about sex and not confine it within locked doors. Educate young, create an open environment for more casual talks. Help prevent  STDs and  teen pregnancies… We should. We all love SEX 😉

#quotes #sexquotes #lovequotes #styleestate
Pinterest. Its true 😉

BUT,  if ‘Sex’ was made a cheap talk, and everyone were so casual about it that they didn’t mind hooking up with every next person they met, ending up on new bed everyday, would there be any value of it i wonder?

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Pinterest.   This is what i would think, if sex became too easy

 

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Pinterest.   or worse…. 😉

The topic is always open for endless discussions.

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Finally, leaving you guys with my memory of  how it was, discovering sex for me for the first time..

patheos
Patheos.com   (Sex education is important!) hahahhaha

 

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11 thoughts on “Caught up on uneasy sex chat”

  1. Another wonderful write your highness and very thought provoking I might add on a subject that takes a lot of thought…..because it’s something everyone thinks about. The topic along with the pictures you added really adds interest to this and it kept me reading and I love the wit involved.😁. Truth of the matter is this is something that is changing at a rapid pace that it’s not even taboo anymore, it’s dinner conversation in some places sad to say. In some countries there is a tight leash on it and that’s great but other places, you can get it out of vending machines. I think if people bring it up in conversation they should respect their audience, if it offends someone then they should change the subject because in a certain crowd, it can make people uneasy. But in today’s age, it seems like it’s easier to get than to talk about. After that, what’s to talk about? Great article your majesty, you are a pen among pencils! 😁🃏🌹. I mean it!

    Liked by 2 people

    1. Aw..Joker u alredy know ur coments are alys so encouraging for me!!! I just wanted to put it out there. In case i found people who felt in similar ways like i did. And by the way i am still thankful about our chat on this topic. It helped me to talk it thru with someone of betr understanding. My personality makes it imposible to bring those topics around other people..Hahahaha. So i don wana seem too abrupt. I think its probably okay to b in diner converstaion as long as it is not too in depth and creates a stir or makes other uncomfortable. ike u said, probly dependin on audience is a good way to put it. We are more open about it on these matters with our close frenz than jus frenz than other people and strangers. Whats their to talk about huh? put it in a nice way…hahhaha. That was thought provoking comment too Joker’

      Liked by 2 people

      1. Hahahaha!! Ahh, I misunderstood my majesty…..well, actually your analysts makes a lot more sense. If you do think about it, chances are you will dream about it more. Well, I like your example as well😏, you don’t want to be without me🃏. Hahaha.
        Our minds are very tricky tools your highness, we sometimes see things that aren’t for real but then we’ll sometimes convince ourselves that something isn’t there that is. That’s when the brain is playing games……brain games. 😁

        Liked by 1 person

      2. Hahaha well i figured if i gave an example that catches ur intrest u mit be actually b able to understannd it a lil better. U like the example huh? Hmm ‘somtimes we’ll covince ourselves that something isn’t there that is..’ i wonder what does it mean.. HMmm. ur a good wid riddles. I suck at em..hehhehehhe. Cud this mean ‘we are consciously ignoring what is between us hmm?’ 😉

        Liked by 1 person

      3. Very smart indeed, examples that catches the eye are easily understood by most and I did understand that one fully😁 your highness. That and because you’re very bright. I’m good at riddles but you are too and you’re good at solving them…..you usually figure out your Jokers words quickly.😉. Haha!
        Subconsciously ignoring what is between us? Guess that’s another riddle. Hahahaha! 🃏🃏👸🏼👸🏼

        Liked by 1 person

      4. hahhahahhaha Yeah. i usede some brain thingy with my examples. Anywyas Happy Friendship day Joker!!! I am starting to wonder how long have we been friends..Any idea?? Anywys i believe this is our first friendship day..is it not? we wer together in new year i know!!!!! In the mmidnigh here!! ^_^!

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      5. Hahaha, I’m pretty sure you’re hot in the kitchen your highness!!🔥. And if not, I could help and I bet we could really do something in there!😉. I’m glad you won’t fire me cause I won’t quit, so that means we’ll be together and that is a relief.😏. Planet Freeze at a melting point, hahaha….very true indeed but it’s specially formulated and you are a special kind of person that keeps everything up, if you know what I mean. That’s why my spirits are always up.🙂. A name change huh? Hahaha!
        So you like tricks huh? Well, I can have you clapping all night and I’ll have you admiring a certain person all night long.😏. A certain Joker🃏 that will bring a smile to a certain majesties pretty face👸🏼 with his talents. 😏. I like to smile too because that’s what Jokers do!😁🌹

        Liked by 1 person

      6. hahhaahah seems like kitchen does really get you in mood..i wonder why? Coz it gets nauty everytym in kitchen. ur head look like its under the table or the sink everytym!! Idk wat you mean, care to explain 😉 hmmm sounds like ‘ur boasting ur capabilities!!’ are you? So sure of urself huh.. Well with me as an audience, u mit hav a dificult tyme. I’m a tough one to please.. 😉

        Liked by 1 person

      7. Hahahaha!!! The kitchen gets me in the mood?? That’s where all the cooking is done…..pressure, heat, sweat and other stuff takes place right?😉. If my head is under the table, where is your majesty head at? Hmmm?😏. Care to explain, well I would but I’ll let your highness use her imagination first and see where it takes her😊!
        I have to be confident of myself , shouldn’t I be? Besides, I think I know what I can do😁🃏. With you as an audience, I’m pretty sure I’ll more than rise to the occasion and please my audience. I can bring a smile to a tough one like you, I’m sure of it. 😏🌹

        Liked by 1 person

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