A friend once told me ‘do you know who are the most racist in this world?’. I didn’t have to hear the answer. I knew and i know. ‘Asians’. Some may not agree to this but i talk for the ‘majority’. It’s true. We are’ racist among ourselves, within our country, inside our communities, deeper in our neighbourhoods and segregated ‘inside and out’ even before we start to merge at the ground levels. So, it is no surprise to hear, we can be unwelcome of those outside the entire sphere. What better way to understand this division than understanding the basic principle of ‘Marriage’itself.
Let me begin, by sharing with you, my family’s expectation of me for choosing ‘Mr Right’. Believe me, it’s a very specific checklist, though it wasn’t presented to me initially as one. P.S Here is the reason why, i believe, i will be unmarried ALLL my life. You’d be too, if you were in my place. 😉
First, a simple geography and social background to help you understand why and how checklist came into existence. Nepal is divided topographically into three distinct areas. Himalayas, Hilly and Terai. With these three different regions, culture and life style are also distinctly different. And another thing is, grossly Nepal has two distinct races of population. ‘Aryans’ and ‘Mongoloid’ which in former days didn’t prefer to intermingle among themselves. And within them, are still many subdivisions.
So, here is how this checklist works. For example, I am ‘Magar’ from mongoloid race. So what ‘list’ includes is, 1) A Nepali citizen, 2) Of Mongoloid race, 3) of Magar origin of same religious belief 4) with settlement in the hilly region and 5) of same social hierarchy. Which means”” practically, my chances of finding ‘Mr Right’ narrows down from 50% to 25% and then to 12.5% with each additional category my parents decide to squeeze in!
Now imagine my dilemma, in UK!! I might as well have to post my picture with a hoarding board saying, these are the checklist, eligible bachelors please apply if you fill in at least 3 out of five criteria s. hehhe.
Thank Goodness. My Parents are now willing to comply and be more flexible. They have now expanded their checklist to following options. 1) Best if previous criteria s work. 2)IF NOT, a well educated Nepali Guy. 3)If NOT, a well educated, Asian Guy in same working field as me.
I don’t know if they are willing to be more flexible than this, but for now, i am just laughing hard. This definitely is a plot to keep me house bound with them for rest of their life!! hahha. But again, i do know someday , when they see me still unmarried in my late 30s or 40s..They are going to be like ‘ please just make sure.. you get married’. hehehe.